Naked Bisquets

My, there's a lot going on in this one.

It's all fine until we get to the fourth line, and then it gets a bit snarky. We have milk, yogurts and then MY MILK-YOGURT . Possessive much?

Then on the next line, some weird words start creeping in, as if the effort of shouting MY MILK YOGURT has reduced the writer's ability to spell. First we have the strangely quizzical Cerals?, then two lines further on the peculiar whitness, and on the next line Naked Bisquets.

A little further on and we have pro-biolic grinks and Bio yoghurst.

Calm down, people. Never get so angry you forget how to spell.

Minimalism Again

I was beginning to think that the person who made this list was on such a tight budget that they could only afford two onion rings and two rashers of bacon at one time. At one time, a person could just get two slices of bacon at one time from the local butcher or small grocery, but unless you have a supermarket with a particularly fantastic meat and deli section, you're probably better off buying the pre-packed stuff. I realised after a moment that this person wanted 2 bags of onion ring - type corn snacks (think Funyuns) and 2 bags of bacon-rasher-type corn snacks a la Frazzles.

Still - seems odd to write a list with only three things on it...

Overambitious

Now, here's a list with a delicious sounding smattering of ingredients - celery, red peppers, chillies, dill, leeks, onions, and chicken thighs and drumsticks. I don't know about you, but I think almost anyone could make a yummy dinner out of that little lot.

However, if you notice in the picture the list is written on a folded piece of paper. So, naturally, I unfolded it.

The way I see it, there are two possible scenarios here:

1) The person that wrote the list only had a few ingredients in mind but all they could find was a sheet of A4 copier paper; or

2) The person had a rather more ambitious and elaborate meal in mind, possibly one involving roast partridge and Duchesse  potatoes, confit of pheasant and a reduction of stilton with an asparagus foam or some such nonsense, grabbed the largest piece of paper they could find and, perhaps fuelled by frustration from having two pens dry up on them immediately, promptly changed their mind dramatically. They then folded the piece of paper to appear smaller so that they wouldn't look like such an upper-class twit in public.

Paper, Not Tomato,s

One of the things that I always find a bit worrying are the people who use commas in place of apostrophes, and are apparently fine with that. Here we have that particular affliction coupled with bad spelling and indecision - the way the word PAPER  is placed alongside the crossed-out TOMATO,S as if the one replaces the other...

"No, I said paper, not tomato,s!"

It does seem a rather random little list. In my mind, I try to decide what, if any, dish these people are trying to cook based on the listed items, but I must say I am struggling to find any recipes that combine salami, bread, milk and parsnip. I defy you to find one either.

No wonder Mum needs a drink.